Module 23 Coaching T.E.A. (CONNECT )
Thoughts – Emotions – Actions
We started the conversation with a reflective question: what word/s triggered you this week
The reflection was around what you wanted to hear based on your own story that is influenced by thoughts and emotions that result in us acting or not.
How can we apply this in our everyday life? When we as Coaches are aware of our state and frame in certain situations it is easier to work on ourselves first. This is the making of a great Coach.
Thoughts
The stories we tell ourselves influence our emotions and actions – our belief system – a series of stories that we heard and start to live by and become our truth. Once we have the story, we will find ways to validate the story as truth. We should bear in mind that there are many stories, and as Coache’s, by being curious and asking questions we can deepen our Coachee’s thinking by unpacking the stories that might be holding them back.
Emotions
Emotions affect our thoughts and actions. Our emotions could empower us or disempower us. This can cause us to spiral with our thoughts. I love emotions, the release of them supports our clarity of thinking and influences our behaviors
Actions
Actions influence thoughts and emotions
The language of others creates negative thoughts
All of these are attached to the way we show up in the world. Our brain processes our emotions and creates cortisol, which is necessary for us, however when cortisol levels are consistently high over a long period, it can create illness.
Love is shown to have the highest positive vibration. At work, this is expressed through appreciation, respect, trust, recognition, and care.
What are the stories that we tell ourselves that create our triggers and emotions to act in a certain way?
My thoughts can affect my internal states that influence my behaviors.
As a Coach, it is important to be aware of our own words that could trigger our Coachee.
Strategies for stronger Mental Health
Identify, and re-frame patterns – allows us to see them differently, with a different lens. A simple change of the content, even emotions can shift the way we see things and possibly the whole conversation. Sometimes we get stuck on certain word choices, different words can create a new sense of how we see the situation/ challenge. Move from negative to positive. Questions can lead the thinker into positive thinking, i.e. when was a time that you were successful in the specific scenario? Alternatively, when someone acknowledged you for your work?
Challenge beliefs (table and legs) what still holds to the beliefs – a table is only as strong as its legs. When someone says that “they are good for nothing” and you accept it as your self-belief with all the negative language, it is only as strong as the legs that support it. Describe the things that hold the beliefs as truth. What are you thinking? tell me more…… Sometimes we watch others and mirror it back to ourselves. What are the thoughts behind the statement? What have you tried? What could be one action that you could take to change your belief? A thought process can be stuck on a negative belief or limiting belief. The Coachee has to go through doubt on their own ‘legs” and how it is setting them up/serving them.
Confront fear, and phobias – This comes from a place of insecurity or inadequacy. When we can confront our fears, we find a better version of ourselves.
Journal Thoughts ( -/+), behaviors
Predict “ what will happen” Scenario – take on the fears and predict the positive towards what can happen ( not what will go wrong )
Role play through behaviors – future pacing into behavior that gives us our future thinking into our successes
Activity schedule to lock in activation ( habits) – This can support us in creating good behavior and habits
Breaking it down to bite sizes/ small steps
Relaxation exercises– This could be deep breathing or Meditation that helps us be still in my mind and body,