15 March 2015
Sharing my thoughts: Where am I now?
I just boarded a flight to Da ra Salaam, Tanzania , another work assignment. As I sit awaiting the flights take off a million thoughts run through my mind, so how am I really, after the recent events that shook my world?
I cannot honestly say that I am ok, the thoughts of Shaun and the past still ring through me like it happened yesterday, being away from the kids makes it even more real, as a friend so correctly put it, “Kay you on your own in a foreign country and don’t have anyone around that you need to be strong for” So all I can succumb to is my weakness over losing a love that I believed I had inherited for eternity, that’s rather ironic, how I long for the lost love that I prayed so hard to be removed from.
The amount of attention I currently receive from men, married and single, is over whelming, flattering hardly, because with every interaction I learn more about me and more about how the past experience had scared me, scared me in a way that I honestly wouldn’t know if pure, honest love smacked me in the face. I know that this is undertaking I need to trust God with and the right person will present themselves at the right time.
So it is only fair to admit that it’s not the person but the feeling, the want and need to be in an everlasting relationship that I miss. As I sit and the flight progresses towards Tanzania, watching a movie about a man trying to design a machine to combat Hitler’s army, determined to break codes to save lives in the war between England and Germany, I can’t help but think how much the world has moved forward yet at the same time in so many ways still stands motionless.
The wars remain very prominent in our lives, we are all plagued by the wars of life, the crime we face, the sadistic human beings that hurt children, living in times where we continuously hurt each other, the ones often closest to us.
This piece has suddenly taken a turn, I intended on writing about where I am, life, love and business, and instead my thoughts go to the world that consumes us in a way that leaves me feeling hopeless. So how can we change it, how can we make it right and become more righteous in our actions and thoughts. Will it get any better, or have we become a society engulfed by the seven deadly sins that we know no other way!
To think this is the world that we have to bring up our children in, and it’s no better across borders, the hate and wars catch up in different ways and forms, no matter where we are.
I guess the message that I really want to pass through this blog is that it all starts with you and me, how we react to action taken against us, how we treat others, the values we teach our children.
The lies, theft from our fellow brothers and sisters need to come to an end. We need to share wealth across the world… oh my as I write this statement about sharing wealth, I want to laugh at myself, considering the selfish world we live in, still maybe this article will reach at least just one person that will change their thinking, and if it does, then it means there is still hope for us!
After all Life is for living: www.lifeisforliving.co.